Love Notes to My Girlfriends


Yes, you read that right.

This Valentine's Day, I'm writing love notes to all my favorite friends. Sure, I might get a card for my husband too, but this Valentine’s Day, I’m focusing on my friend-love.

I have a group of friends, who I’ve known since high school (or longer) and we get together once a month for dinner at someone’s house. In December, I explained my idea for February's dinner and everyone rolled their eyes. Mostly because they're just tired of me coming up with weird ideas and making them do it so I can write about it. But here's my thinking: some of us give cards to our spouses or boyfriends and some of us don't give cards to anyone because we're single. And while romantic love is grand and lovely and blah blah blah, there are a lot of other people in my life that I love and I probably don't mention it enough.

One of the reasons I love this completely made-up and ridiculous holiday is because I get to do fun stuff with my kids whom I love dearly, I get to wear pink and red to school and not feel like I'm clashing, and people are just nicer to each other on this day. So when I was thinking about loving people well (something I want to do better), I thought about all the non-romantic love I have for people in my life and how they might not know how much I dig them.

So I'm writing love notes to my girlfriends this year.

I'm making them write notes also even though they're all grumbling and one person has dubbed this "lesbian card exchange." I'm not asking for everyone to write page-long letters to everyone else in the group, but I am asking everyone to write something. A little encouragement, a thanks, a funny story, a favorite memory of them, whatever, I'm just asking my friends to write to each other. It's making some people really uncomfortable, and I realize not everyone loves to write like I do, but I do know everyone likes to receive cards and since handwritten ones are best, we're working through the grumbling.

I'm also completely aware that my friends are good sports. I find it slightly funny that they roll their eyes at my ideas and then just do it anyway. Those are some good friends, guys. Go get yourself some of those if you don't have them.

So this week, I'm exchanging Valentine's Day cards with my girlfriends. I didn't think through whether we'd open them up in front of everyone, I kinda hope we don't, but I can't wait to hand out my cards. And I hope this sticks, that we get to spend every February for years to come trading cards with each other. Some of these girls were around to put their Cabbage Patch and Lisa Frank cards in my shoebox mailbox in elementary school and I'm just thankful they're still in my life. And that they just roll their eyes and accept me.


This post originally appeared February 2015 on



Meet The Author

Contributing Writer

Mary Graham is a lifelong resident of Indianapolis, Indiana. She lives with her husband, two daughters, and rescue dog, Blue. During the day, she teaches high school English and at night (after the girls are asleep), she writes for The Huffington Post, Pearson's Teachability, For Every Mom, her own blog TrustyChucks & various other print and digital outlets. In her spare time, she likes to read, travel, eat chocolate, run half marathons, and then eat more chocolate.

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